What Is Narcissistic Abuse?

Your relationship isn’t exactly what you thought it was. Although things seemed perfect in the beginning, you’re now seeing some red flags that you didn’t notice when you first started dating.

It’s almost as if the honeymoon phase has passed. It feels like you’re dating a completely different person than the one you used to know. You’d be lying if you felt like you haven’t also changed or transformed into someone else.

You’re constantly walking on eggshells with your partner. You don’t want to do or say the wrong thing. You don’t want to hurt or upset them. Lately, you seem to care more about their thoughts, feelings, and emotions than yours. You used to be so carefree and independent; what happened to you? Where did the real you go?

If you share similar feelings, you’re not alone. There’s a good chance that you may be involved in a narcissistic relationship. If you’re unsure what that is, don’t worry, we’re here to help. Let’s find out what exactly narcissistic abuse is.

What is Narcissistic Abuse?

Simply put, narcissistic abuse is abuse that comes from a narcissist. This type of abuse happens when someone who has narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) tries to control, manipulate, or mistreat someone in order to gain control over them.

The Cause

There isn’t one specific cause for narcissistic abuse, but there are several factors that can play a role in the development of narcissism. Genetics plays a huge role in someone developing narcissistic traits and tendencies. Some of the most common personality traits among narcissists are aggression, having a short fuse or temper, or difficulty regulating their own emotions.

Another common cause of narcissism is childhood experiences. If a child was shown an excessive amount of praise or made to believe that they were the smartest or most talented child in their class, they may be more at risk for becoming a narcissist. On the other hand, if a child felt rejected or hurt in their younger years, they could show signs of narcissism as well.

The Signs

When you’re in a relationship, it can be hard to spot the signs of narcissistic abuse because of the cycle of positive and negative emotions that a narcissist can show to their partner. These are some of the most common traits of a narcissist:

  • Arrogance

  • Believing they’re better than others

  • Charming or charismatic

  • Controlling

  • Entitlement

  • Jealousy

The Tactics

There are many tactics that a narcissist will implement in their relationships in order to try to receive or maintain a feeling of control. These are some of the most common tactics:

  • Anger

  • Belittling

  • Blackmail

  • Controlling

  • Exploiting

  • Gaslighting

  • Intimidation

  • Lying

  • Revenge

The Impact of Narcissistic Abuse

Any type of abuse can have an impact on your emotional, physical, and psychological health. It can bring on many different signs and symptoms of trauma like the following:

  • Body aches

  • Developmental issues

  • Digestive issues

  • Emotional and psychological damage

  • Isolation

  • Low self-esteem

  • Self-doubt

  • Suicidal ideation

  • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

Next Steps

While overcoming narcissistic abuse may seem overwhelming, it is possible. With the right steps towards overcoming the abuse, you can leave the relationship and start the healing journey to finding a healthy relationship again. One of the best ways to start the process of overcoming the abuse that you’re dealing with or working through the aftermath so you don’t end up in a similar situation again is to seek proper treatment through a licensed and trained mental health professional.

Working with a therapist can help you get to the root cause of the abuse, help you work through any signs or symptoms you may be experiencing, and help you move forward in your life again. Recovery and healing are both possible. Reach out to us today to set up a consultation for trauma therapy or relationship counseling.

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